look at me
but don’t tell me what you see
unless who you see is who I know myself to be
love me
but don’t tell me your love
unless your thirst needs to pour it on me like water
listen to me
but not to what my words are saying
unless you can hear the ringing meaning I mean to say
stay with me
but not to a suffocation of the self
unless your heart is deep and wide and calm in its whorling center
kiss me
but don’t touch me
unless the fire in you sees the fire in me and is burning to burn together
it’s not that I deftly avoid love’s danger
it’s not that I have managed to save my heart this pain
I’m really good at the binary of all or nothing
I’m very used to sacrificing myself in love’s name
but I don’t want to sacrifice like that any more
look at me
into my eyes, into the sharp velvety darkness I am
and stay, please
stay with me now
Poetry is the only language I want to speak right now.
The world is big and heartbreaking but also beautiful and so full of the enormity and range of human love, hope, rage, hate, grief, and connection. I know that I always say this but I mean it: we are never alone. You are not alone.
xox,
Nix
featured image is a photo by Marek Piwnicki on Unsplash
